Pushing Me Away
by Miara
Summary: Tired of pining for Inuyasha, Kagome begins to move on. Only when it's too late does Inuyasha discover what he has lost, and what someone else has gained. (Sess/Kag) COMPLETE
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: You know the schpiel. Char not mine, plot mine.

Spoilers: Roughly tankouban 18. I can't figure out when the Inuyasha/Kikyou scene is datewise, so I'm arbitrarily setting it at the end of the school year, which will allow Kagome to stay in the past for several months. If I'm wrong, then ... I'm not going to change it.

Author's warning: What I did on my Xmas vacation: I wrote this fic. I was far from reference material (ie the manga) and Internet access, so the characters are pretty OOC and it probably has a few glaring errors. Writing it kept me sane while in the clutches of family, and that was the main point, but now that it's done I thought I would share.

Author's notes: There's a slightly longer version of this on my personal site, including the sex cut out in part 4. If you're allowed to read slightly kinky smut and are interested, head over, the site URL is in my profile.

* * *

Pushing Me Away

_I've lied  
To you  
The same way that I always do  
This is   
The last smile  
That I'll fake for the sake of being with you  
  
Everything falls apart Even the people who never frown  
Eventually break down  
  
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie  
  
Everything has to end  
You'll soon find we're out of time left  
To watch it all unwind  
  
The sacrifice of never knowing  
  
Why I never walked away  
Why I played myself this way  
Now I see your testing me pushes me away  
  
I've tried  
Like you  
To do everything you wanted to  
This is  
The last time  
I'll take the blame for the sake of being with you  
_

Prologue 

It was night again, and Kagome was staring at the sky. She thought idly that it was amazing how clear it was in this time, how many stars she could see. There was the Great Bear, and over there the Little Bear, which meant that that star there was the North Star 

A part of her mind was well aware of what she was doing, and although she tried to ignore it, she knew she was going to have to deal with it eventually.

Two weeks ago, Inuyasha had chosen. And the person he had wasn't her. 

Kagome remembered vividly the scene in the clearing, Inuyasha holding Kikyou in his arms, telling her that he would protect her, that his life was hers.

At the time, she had gone back to her world, and decided that she would continue to follow Inuyasha. That being with him would be enough. But these last two weeks had taught her otherwise. 

It hurt, she thought. It hurt to know that the person she loved had chosen the woman who had tried to kill her. No matter that she understood his motives, understood that Inuyasha still loved Kikyou, that he felt guilty that she had chosen to die and follow him, it didn't help. Understanding what causes you pain doesn't make the pain go away. Only removing the source of the pain does that.

For a while she pondered her options, but there didn't seem to be many.

She could leave, go back to her own time, and never return, she supposed. But that wasn't really an option. No matter her feelings for Inuyasha, there was the Shikon. She was partly responsible for it's current shattered state, and it was her obligation to try to make things right. She felt duty bound to stay in the Sengoku-jidai until the Skikon was restored and Naraku stopped. Besides, even leaving Inuyasha out of the equation, she had friends here that she would miss if she simply left. 

But she couldn't do it anymore. But these last two weeks had been harder than she could have imagined, and she couldn't imagine facing a future full of more just like them. Couldn't bear to laugh and smile and pretend that everything was all right. Couldn't pretend that it didn't hurt, that it wasn't killing her to have to stay by his side, pretending to be just a friend. Couldn't just be his shard detector, quiet and invisible.

So what was left?

Only one option. If she loved Inuyasha, and he, well she couldn't say that he didn't love her, because she knew he did. But he hadn't *chosen* her, so he didn't love her enough. And if that was true, then the only way for the hurting to stop was for her to stop loving Inuyasha. She had tried that before, and failed. She had tried staying in her time, had tried to date Hoji, but nothing had managed to make her forget Inuyasha. But after the last two weeks, she knew she no longer had a choice. Either she stopped loving Inuyasha, or she was going to collapse. This time, she decided, she would simply have to do better.


	2. Changes

When Sango shook her awake at sunrise, Kagome was exhausted. She had spent most of the night trying to figure out how to get over Inuyasha. It had been well after midnight before she had been satisfied with her strategy.

Now all she needed to do was put it into action.

She decided to start as they were eating breakfast. Inuyasha was off doing who knew what, and she hoped that her friends would be willing to help her.

"Sango?"

"Hai, Kagome-san?"

"May I ride on Kirara with you from now on?"

She could see surprise, quickly followed by comprehension on Sango's face.

"Hai Kagome." Sango said quietly, smiling at her friend.

"I suppose it is for the best," said Miroku with a nod, and Kagome nearly wept with relief. She knew that the monk enjoyed the enforced proximity with the youkai exterminator that riding the cat youkai caused, and she was grateful he was willing to give it up without protest.

"Thank you." she told them. "I need to get over him," she continued bluntly, wanting to spell it out so they would know that this wasn't just another one of Kagome and Inuyasha's ongoing fights. "I can't keep this up anymore."

"It's OK, Kagome," Sango told her, coming over to hug the younger woman. "We understand. And we'll try our best to help you."

*** 

The next step came soon after Inuyasha returned to camp, ready to set off for the day's travels.

"Come on, Kagome," he said, tapping his foot impatiently. "We need to hurry if we're going to make it to Nara by nightfall." He reached out to lift her onto his back, but Kagome jumped away from him.

"I'm going to ride with Sango today," she told him, trying to keep her voice steady.

"Feh. If you think that means I'm carrying the pervert, think again." His voice clearly reflected his opinion of that strategy.

"You're the one who wants to get to Nara, Inuyasha," Sango surprised Kagome by telling the hanyou. "If you don't want to carry Miroku, don't, but we won't make it." 

"Feh." Inuyasha snorted again. "Whatever. Get over here monk. Looks like we're stuck with each other until Kagome stops sulking again."

*** 

They made good time with Shippou, Sango, and Kagome riding on Kirara and Inuyasha carrying Miroku as they hurried towards the ancient capital. By late afternoon, it seemed they might manage to reach their destination before sunset.

They were crossing a rain swollen river when Sango noticed some odd ripples in the water and directed Kirara towards the shore. Inuyasha, seeing them land, leapt towards them.

"What are you doing wench? We don't have time to waste here. Get moving!"

"I'm not sure, Inuyasha" the youkai exterminator told him, watching the ripples vanish and reform. "But something about those," she indicated the source of her concern, "bothers me."

"Feh. It's nothing but wind. Move."

Kagome had been peering into the water as they spoke. She wasn't certain, but she thought she could see...

"I think there's a shard in the river," she said, wishing that the water was clearer. She could sense a shard, yes, but somehow it's presence was fuzzy, hidden. She was about to continue when the surface of the river erupted as a massive head on a long neck lifted out of the water, turning to examine them through baleful eyes.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, Inuyasha," said Miroku as he retreated slowly away from the towering monster, "but I don't think we want to get close to that thing.."

"It has a shard in it's mouth," Kagome told them, suddenly able to see its glow now that it was above water.

"Shit," muttered Inuyasha as he drew Tetsusaiga and launched himself towards the river youkai. "I wish these damn things would quit popping up." He swung his sword around for a clean blow at the neck, only to be flung abruptly back when the thing opened it's mouth to spit a stream of vile looking liquid over him.

"Arrgghh!" Inuyasha fell to the ground, trying frantically to wipe the noxious substance from his face before it overwhelmed his canine senses.

The aborted attack had given Kagome and Sango enough time to reach their weapons and begin their attacks. Sango launched her boomerang at the thing, but it dodged easily. Kagome's arrow was more effective, but still managed to miss its target when the creature dodged again. Before they could rearm, the thing lunged at them, mouth open to reveal serrated teeth. It might have managed to capture one of they, but Miroku suddenly appeared, knocking them aside. 

The monk was almost out of range of the creature's attack when it managed to catch him by the arm. He screamed in pain, a scream that cut off abruptly when Inuyasha, recovered, managed to decapitate the thing, causing it's jaws to loosen.

Miroku fell to his knees, his good hand pressing against the wound in his arm. Beside him, Inuyasha collapsed as the stench of the fluid finally overcoming him.

Kagome rushed forward, then came to an abrupt stop. She looked back and forth between the two fallen men before turning firmly away from Inuyasha.

_He's youkai, he'll heal. Miroku needs your help more,_ she told herself, trying to dispell the incredible feeling of guilt that was trying to overwhelm her. _And besides, he never wants you to help him anyway. Just give him what he wants. Let go._

She never noticed the stunned look on Inuyasha's face as she cleaned and wrapped Miroku's injured arm.

"Are you feeling better, Miroku-san?" she asked when she was done.

"Much better, Kagome. Please, you have such gentle hands..." he caressed them as he spoke, and she knew what was coming. "Will you bear my child?"

"You're so predictable," she told him laughingly. 

"Your harsh words wound me, dearest Kagome," he replied, clasping his hands over his heart, his eyes twinkling madly. "For my heart is steadfast, and I know no other way to tell you of its hopes."

"Ah, houshi-sama," she sighed, "I fear to disappoint you, honest monk, but I fear my heart is not mine to give. Were it so, then yours it would be, but that can never come to pass. And so I ask you to cease your pursuit, and seek another whose heart is yet free." She saw Sango come into the clearing, and gestured towards her, declaiming, "Lo, and in this moment there comes such a maid. Make haste, sir monk, and woo her ere some sly dog steal her beauty also from thy side." She was amused to see Miroku blush and fall silent.

Sango was laughing as she joined them, having overheard their byplay. "I fear, dir sir," she said, easily falling into their silliness, "that I am but a simple maid, and no fit match for such a man. I have no gift to give save tears, for needs must I avenge my brother Koh, stole by a villain foul as cesspit's air."

"Dearest lady," Miroku seemed to have recovered his tongue, and his words tripped lightly from his tongue, "as thou willst grant me leave, I will assist thee in thy quest, for thy heart is pure and true, and I can but honor such cause with my unworthy life. But if, when victory is ours and this villain hast been routed by our righteous fury, then willst thou heed my suit and claim my heart? I fear it has been thine these many months before, and sickens for the lack of thee."

"Dear monk," Sango replied, "If when all tasks at last are done, and all our dreams within our grasp have come, if then thou art of this same mind, then I shall love thee for thy sturdy aid, and then shall we two build new worlds of hope and love."

All humor dropped from Miroku's face. "I hope so, Sango," he told her softly, brushing a strand of hair away from her face with his rosary bound hand. "I truly do."

Kagome turned away, pain stabbing through her heart. _I wish I could have someone who loved me like that._ she thought. Looking around, she spotted Inuyasha cleaning himself in the stream. _I'm glad he's all right._

The next several days were filled with tension. Kagome and Inuyasha were trying to avoid each other, but in such a small group it was nearly impossible for them to avoid having to interact. Kagome was starting to wonder if she shouldn't just give up and go home through the well when her thoughts were interrupted by the appearance of Sesshoumaru.

Lost in her thoughts, she had missed the initial exchange of insults between the two half-brothers, and now they were engaged in full out battle for possession of the Tetsusaiga. Neither seemed to be able to gain any advantage over the other, although together they were doing significant damage to their surroundings. Kagome and the others were forced to retreat to a safer spot away from the battle.

As they sheltered behind a rock, a movement ahead and to her right caught Kagome's eye. She looked more closely, and was startled to see a young girl standing in the trees, her eyes locked on the battle taking place.

Horror filled her as she realized that Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru were drawing closer to the child, and that she wasn't going to be able to escape the energies being emitted by the swords' clashing auras. Praying to whatever gods would listen, she sprinted towards the girl, hoping against hope that she would reach her before the fringes of the fight..

Behind her, she heard the sound of Tetsusaiga and Toukijin clashing, but she ignored it in her race to reach the girl, who seemed mesmerized by the fighting youkais.

Dimly, as she broke through the trees, she heard Inuyasha shout. "Cutting Wind!" She grabbed the girl and looked around to see that Sesshoumaru had leapt clear of the strike and that the blades of the wind were coming directly at them. There was no way to avoid the strike. The girl screamed as she saw the swirling winds, and Kagome closed her eyes, stepped behind a nearby tree, and turned her back, bracing for the impact, hoping that between the tree and her own body, enough of the attack would be absorbed that the girl would be protected.

It never came. 

She could hear the sound of Inuyasha's attack around her, the furious shaking of the underbrush, but no blade touched her skin. Confused, she opened her eyes, and was stunned to realize that she was surrounded by a bright blue aura, a shield that was protecting both her and the child. Behind her, the sounds of battle had died away, and when she turned, the girl still held in her arms, she saw Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru staring at her.

Inuyasha looked stunned by what had almost happened, by what he had nearly done.

Sesshoumaru had lost his customary composure, and was speeding toward her with a curious look on his face. He's frightened! was all Kagome had time to think before the youkai lord came to a stop outside her shield.

"Let me in," he ordered, and Kagome took a step back, frightened by the fierce emotion she could hear in his voice. Her arms tightened protectively about the girl, but her young charge had other plans and wriggled free of Kagome's grasp to dropped to the ground.

"Sesshoumara-sama! Rin was scared! But the pretty lady saved Rin!" she cried as she ran toward Sesshoumaru, and Kagome was stunned to see relief pass over the youkai's face before the familiar impassive mask dropped over it.

"What are you doing here, Rin?" Sesshoumaru asked the girl calmly, standing unmoving as she wrapped her arms around his legs. "You were told to wait with Jaken."

"Rin got lonely and wanted to see you, Sesshoumaru-sama." she replied with a happy smile, completely unafraid of the youkai towering over her.

"And where is Jaken?" The tone of his voice promised that someone, probably Jaken, would soon be hurting.

"Rin hid until nasty Jaken went away." The girl seemed proud of herself, and Kagome was stunned to see resigned humor in Sesshoumaru's eyes. She was having a hard time processing the thought of Sesshoumaru and a human child, a girl at that, when Inuyasha broke in. 

"Do you think you can hide behind a kid, Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru shot Inuyasha a look of barely restrained disgust. "I, Sesshoumaru, have no need to hide from a hanyou such as yourself. But I fear I must leave for now. We will resume our discussion later." 

They stood and watched as he lifted the girl into his arms and leapt into the air. In a flash he was gone.

*** 

Sesshoumaru looked through the trees towards his brother's camp. He wondered why he was doing this.

Rin. He was doing this because of Rin.

His brother's miko had saved the child earlier, when Sesshoumaru had been too distracted by his fight with Inuyasha to notice her standing in the woods. She had protected Rin, risking her own life to shield the girl from the same attack that had nearly killed Sesshoumaru himself several months earlier.

He was in her debt.

He brushed aside the thought that Rin was human, and that he should not feel such gratitude towards her saviour. He did care, and that was all that mattered. 

And so here he was, skulking through the forest like some low youkai, in search of a woman he had almost killed mere hours before.

He could see his brother seated in one of the treetops, staring off into the distance. Below him, the monk and youkai hunter were setting up camp for the night. The kitsune was calling something up at his brother, but the wind carried the sound away before it reached him. _Where is she?_ he wondered with mounting frustration.

He began to circle the camp, his senses sifting the world around him for some clue to her whereabouts. He was downwind of the group when he caught the first hint of her presence, a muffled sob coming from some nearby rocks.

She was crying.

Sesshoumaru was irritated by this sign of human weakness, but his honor demanded that he at least offer the woman his thanks, so he strode over to stand before her. He had managed to come within arms length of her before she reacted to his presence, looking up and dashing the tears from her face. Her eyes widened in shock as she realized who stood before her.

"Sesshoumaru," she whispered, her eyes wide.

"Miko." It occured to him suddenly that he didn't know her name. She was human, mortal, and so he had never bothered to remember it, although he knew he had heard it many times before.

"W-what do you want?" She was calmer than he had expected, and it prompted him to ask her a question.

"Why are you crying?"

A strange look passed over her face, and he wondered what was going on in her mind. Her answer surprised him. "Inuyasha."

"What has my idiot brother done now?" he asked in disgust. What had the hanyou managed to do that would cause this woman to creep off and cry alone? And why did he care?

"Nothing. He just ... it's nothing." She broke off suddenly, as though realizing who she was talking to. But watching her eyes, Sesshoumaru could see that it *was* something, and he suddenly realized what it must be.

"He has chosen the undead thing has he." New tears sparkled in her eyes, letting him know that he had guessed correctly.

"I keep trying not to care, but it hurts." She whispered.

Sesshoumaru pondered. He owed this woman for what she had done. She needed to get away from his brother. It would chafe his brother to lose her. She was human, but at least she was powerful, and she did bathe regularly. Having a human woman around might be good for Rin.

"Then leave him. I, Sesshoumaru, will permit you to travel with me." There, the offer was made.

"But why?" she asked, shocked.

"For many reasons," he told her, irritated that she had not simply accepted the honor he had offered her.

He could see in her eyes that she was tempted. "But the Shikon... I have to fix it and stop Naraku."

Sesshoumaru was reluctantly impressed. Clean, and she seemed to have a sense of responsibility. How very unusual. He admitted to himself that although he, himself, did not fear Naraku, or covet the Shikon no Tama, the shards of the Shikon had nonetheless been an annoyance. It seemed that any youkai that acquired one immediately deluded itself into believing that it was capable of defeating the Lord of the Western Lands, and over the last year and a bit he had faced a ridiculous number of challenges for his land. Perhaps it was time to take a more active role in pest control.

"Very well. We will search for the shards." From a pocket in his obi he withdrew a small pouch and offered it to her. "As a token."

She took the leather bag and opened it. Inside she found over a dozen shards that Sesshoumaru had removed from the remains of defeated challengers.

Kagome surprised him by grinning. 

"Oh, that's going to make Naraku's life sooo much fun when he runs out of other shards to collect."

She weighed the bag in her hand for a moment, her eyes focused on something only she could see.

"All right. I'll come with you." She closed her hand around the bag and tucked it into her pocket. "I'll be back in a minute. I have to get my bag, and let my friends know I'm leaving."

Sesshoumaru felt something inside him relax at her acceptance. Had he truly wanted her to travel with him? How strange.

He remained behind, watching as the miko strode back into the clearing and lifted an overstuffed yellow bag to her shoulder. She spoke to her companions, and whatever she said got a violent reaction. The kitsune threw himself at her, sobbing, while the two humans seemed merely concerned, drawomg close and asking questions. 

The miko seemed to waver under their concern, and Sesshoumaru was on the verge of striding off in disgust, when his idiot brother intervened. Whatever the hanyou said caused her to turn bright red, and he could hear her shout.

"Sit, sit, sit, sit, sit." 

At her words, Inuyasha flew face first into the ground as his body was pummeled by some invisible force. When he lay groaning, the miko gestured violently in his direction, saying something to her friends. They nodded, and she removed something from around her neck, handing it to the monk. She hugged the cub one last time and turned to stomp determinedly away from them.

Soon she was facing him. Sesshoumaru could see lingering anger in her eyes.

"One more thing," she told him, and he waited, curious, to hear this new condition. "My name is Kagome. Or miko. Or hey you. I 'll even answer to human. But I won't answer to wench, and I won't be responsible for what happens if you call me bitch."

Sesshoumaru, amused by this new evidence of his brother's idiocy, decided that he could live with that.


	3. Learning isn't always easy

3. Learning

The next few weeks were a revelation to Kagome. Until now, all she had known of Sesshoumaru had come from their occasional encounters and Inuyasha's ravings. She had thought him a lone wanderer, emotionless, a cold-blooded killer.

She had learned otherwise.

He wasn't a cold-blooded killer. Or rather he was, but he didn't kill for pleasure, as she had thought. Any creature that challenged him would be disposed of immediately, with neither fanfare nor exertion, but that which did not threaten him, or those under his protection, he ignored.

He wasn't emotionless. His remoteness was a mask, worn to hide the person who had rescued Rin, and who, she was beginning to realize, had rescued her.

And he wasn't a lone wanderer either. That had been the biggest surprise.

Given the nature of their encounters, she had assumed that Sesshoumaru lived much like her group of friends did, wandering from location to location in pursuit of some goal.

He didn't.

Their first trip, after she had fled from Inuyasha, had been to the heart of the Western Lands, where she was stunned to discover that Sesshoumaru had a palace to rival the Imperial capital in Kyoto. It had a large central pavilion which was used for business, with a council room and library. To the east were a number of connected pavilions used to house retainers, courtiers, and envoys from other youkai lords when they visited Sesshoumaru's domain. To the west, separated from these by a large and beautifully maintained garden, complete with pond were more pavilions, these ones used to house the lord and his family, and honored guests.

To her surprise, Kagome had been shown to a room in the same pavilion Rin's rooms occupied, one that was attached to Sesshoumaru's through a single covered pathway. They had arrived late one night, and gone straight to bed, but she was awakened early the next morning by a middle-aged human woman who brought her a meal, and proceeded to measure her for clothing. By the time she had finished bathing, her modern garments had vanished, replaced by an elegant kimono of pale green silk patterned with maple leaves and a coral pink obi.

Angry, she had donned the clothing and gone in search of Sesshoumaru, intending to insist on having her clothing returned. Before she could find him, a youkai retainer appeared, informing her that Lord Sesshoumaru was holding court and could not be disturbed. Fortunately for Sesshoumaru, although the creature looked like he was one of Jaken's relatives, he was much more polite, and Kagome allowed him to divert her into a library overlooking the main garden, where she spent the rest of the day pouring through manuscripts about magic of various sorts. Just before evening, she found one dealing with human - miko - magic. The contents of the scroll fascinated her. There were so many things that she could conceivably do that she had never imagined. Soul arrows and the shield she had recently managed to conjure were some of the least of the spells contained on the bamboo slats.

She was trying to figure out how a spell for banishing youkais worked, completely forgetting her earlier anger, when Sesshoumaru entered the library. Lost in trying to remember the meaning of a kanji, she didn't notice his entry. 

"Kagome," he greeted her, drawing her attention, and she rose quickly to her feet. The feeling of him looming over her was just too much.

"Good evening, Sesshoumaru-san." She bowed her head slightly and the sight of her kimono recalled the morning's events.

"My clothing, Sesshoumaru-san?"

"It will be returned to you when we depart. While you are at my home, you will wear proper clothing." she was informed in a cool voice that squashed all possible argument. "But that is not why I am here. I wished to inform you that we will be remaining here for several weeks, possibly two months. Something has come up which requires my attention."

Kagome thought about getting angry. After all, he had promised that they would search for the shards. But the texts she had discovered were fascinating, and she found that she wanted to try to learn some of the spells contained in them. What she could learn in two months, she didn't know, but she could at least try, she thought. "Thank you for telling me, Sesshoumaru-san," she finally said, and bowed slightly. He nodded in return and left without another word.

The days quickly fell into a pattern. Kagome would get up and play with Rin for a while before going off to practice her magic. She would have lunch, practice some more, play with Rin again, have dinner, and then spend some time in the library reading up on other spells. The retainer she met the first day - Osuka - kept her informed about the goings on of the court, and on several occasions, when youkai from neighboring clans were in the palace, he spent the day watching her, making sure that she was kept out of sight.

She managed to learn several minor spells quickly, and was out in the garden practicing a healing spell that drew on the power of the earth - in theory and if practiced right - to heal most injuries, when Osuka appeared and insisted that she return to her pavilion.

"What's going on?" she asked as they scurried towards the building. She had been at the palace for nearly a month, and this was the first time she had been banished from a public area.

"Kyouryu, lord of the Northern Dragons is arriving to speak with Lord Sesshoumaru. He has a particular hatred of humans, and it would be unfortunate if he were to see you or Rin and take offense at your presence."

"Unfortunate how?"

"Lord Sesshoumaru and Kyouryu are allies against the Shiranami. It would be a problem for Lord Sesshoumaru if he were forced to break the alliance because Kyouryu killed you or the girl."

"I thought Sesshoumaru-san was negotiating with the Shiranami. Isn't that who was here last week?"

"Yes. Kaijou, Lord of the Shiranami was here, but he wishes to seal the alliance by wedding his daughter, Kaiho, to Lord Sesshoumaru. Which my lord has deemed an unacceptable price."

Kagome was weirded out. It was one thing to read of marriage alliances like this in history books, another to realize that someone you knew might be required to enter into one. 

"Why?" she asked, curious. After all, Sesshoumaru was very good at ignoring his impulses when it came to everything except Tetsusaiga, and it sounded like this alliance could be useful.

"Lord Sesshoumaru already has an alliance with the Northern Dragons, and as long as that alliance lasts, it is of more worth than one with the Water Clans would be. And forging a blood alliance with the Clans would break the one with the Dragons, as there is much hatred between the two."

"Oh." She had no more questions. The players were getting to complicated for her to follow. "I think I'll just go find Rin. I found a spell last night that animates origami figures that I wanted to show her. Let me know when it's safe to come out."

"Thank you, Kagome-sama."

The Dragon's visit passed without incident. Two weeks later, Kagome was once more in the garden practicing the same healing spell. It was a difficult spell which required the caster to bind his or her spiritual self to the earth in order to draw upon its energies. Kagome had chosen it over many of the other spells on the scroll since it seemed to be the most immediately applicable to the life she was leading in the Sengoku Jidai. For lack of any other wounds to treat, she had taken to cutting herself with a small blade she had asked for shortly after arriving in the Western Lands. She had just made a deep cut in her arm and was summoning the earth energies she would use to seal the wound when Sesshoumaru appeared. 

She was concentrating so hard on the magic she didn't notice him nearing her. Seeing the wound, he stepped forward, reaching out to try to put pressure on it and stop the bleeding just as she released the stored power binding her to the earth. She tried to call out, to warn him, but it was too late. The last thing she remembered seeing before everything went black was the sight of his hand on her arm.


	4. Interlude Dreamtime

Kagome dreamed.

It was unlike any other dream she remembered.

She was running on all fours through the night, glorying in the feel of the wind in her fur, the smooth flow of muscles as she leapt over the forest floor. She could smell the night, the trees around her, the creatures that dwelt in them. A flickering current of air hinted of distant places and dry earth. She paused for a moment, intrigued by the exotic scent, but it was already dissipating, leaving only a memory and a deep need to travel. There was a world out there, and it cried out to be seen.

Another breeze brought a stench that had her wrinkling her nose and barking. Humans, it had to be. Nothing else smelled that sour, that filthy. How did the disgusting creatures bear the smell she wondered for a moment, before springing once more into motion and leaving the thought and the scent behind.

The moon overhead was nearly full, less than a day from it, and she raised her head to howl with the sheer beauty of it. 

It was only at night, when she could run like this, that she felt truly free. 

Her daily life was hemmed about with duties and responsibilities that she sometimes thought would strangle her. Her father was ignoring his responsibilities, too wrapped up with the human he had wed and their hanyou brat to tend to the needs of their lands. And so she found herself patrolling their lands in his place. Watching over those who were theirs. Sitting judgment in his place. Planning for their future. Responsibility had come on her far earlier than she had expected, but for tonight she was free.

She ran.

*** 

Sesshoumaru dreamed.

It was unlike any other dream he remembered.

He was sitting beneath a tree, staring at an old well house. Overhead, a few brave stars struggled to make themselves seen through the orange glow of the city lights. 

The well drew him, and it frightened him. On the other side lay freedom and responsibility, love and pain. On this side were family and loneliness, friendship and his future.

Sometimes he wanted to leap through the well and escape the demands of this dual life he was trying to lead, just give up and surrender his attempts to keep his life in this world going. But there were those who would be hurt if he did, and he didn't dare disappoint them more than he already had.

Sometimes he wanted to forget the well existed, just give up and forget the demands of the past, and try to make the best of his present. But there were those who depended on him, and his responsibility to mend that which he had broken. 

But he couldn't do either. He had ties binding him to both worlds, the fierce beauty of the past and the civilized peace of the present. He would not betray his friends, he would not hurt his family. Somehow, he would find a way to keep going, to live in both worlds. Somehow, somehow, he would.

But for now he would sit under the ancient branches of the old god tree, letting the night breeze soothe him, taking what small pleasure he could in this small time free of duty, free of demands. The city lights were beautiful after all, and tomorrow would come soon enough.

He sat, and tried not to think.

*** 

Kagome and Sesshoumaru dreamed.

It was a starless night, the moon barely visible through the clouds that choked the sky. They stood on a desolate beach, watching storm driven waves crash against the earth as though trying to escape their inevitable deaths. They extended their senses, searching for some trace of life, but found nothing but the sounds of wind and waves.

They stood together beside the storm grey water, neither willing to break the silence.

Eventually, Kagome started to shiver. She looked around, hoping to find some shelter, but found nothing but water and sand. She wrapped her arms around herself, trying to block out the intrusive wind. Suddenly, white clad arms wrapped around her from behind, drawing her back against a firm chest. Sesshoumaru's warmth enveloped her, and she leaned into him, filled with sudden happiness. Neither of them spoke. It didn't seem necessary.

They stood together, watching the waves crash against the shore, until the sun rose over the water, chasing the darkness away.


	5. Aftermath

4. Aftermath 

When Kagome awoke, she found herself in her room. She sat up carefully, feeling as though her head might explode with any sudden movement. 

"Kagome-sama, you're awake." It was one of the maids who had been assigned to serve her, an older human woman who had taken Kagome under her wing shortly after her arrival. "Thank the gods."

"What happened?" Kagome asked, confused. She was fully dressed, and it was light outside, so why was she in her room. She had a sudden flash of memory, a pale white hand touching her arm. Her eyes opened wide and she shot upright, staggering as the edges her vision went gray . "Sesshoumaru! Is he all right? He came in when I was trying to cast a spell and was caught in it." She looked pleadingly at her maid, hoping for good news. The woman looked away.

"He was also found unconscious in the garden. He was taken to his rooms, and had not awoken the last time I was given information."

"Oh, God!" Kagome collapsed. "What happened? I have to see him." 

Her maid stared at the floor.

"You may not leave your room until Sesshoumaru-sama gives his permission, Kagome-sama." She bowed, as though her reverence would make the news more palatable.

"Oh." Kagome closed her eyes again, defeated.

She began to pray.

It was nearly nightfall before there was a scratching at her door. The maid rose to answer it. Kagome held her breath, hoping it would be good news.

"Is Lady Kagome awake?" It was a chamberlain, one Kagome had not met before. 

"Yes, sir. Would you wish to speak with her?" 

"No. Lord Sesshoumaru has instructed me to bring her to his chambers with all haste." Kagome stood, determined to get this over with. At least she knew Sesshoumaru had awoken. And he seemed to be well enough to command her presence. Perhaps he might even forgive her.

"I am ready," she told the chamberlain before allowing him to lead her out of her room.

The short walk was made in silence. Soon they stood before the door of Sesshoumaru's audience chamber. Her guide (jailer?) scratched lightly before sliding the door open. He bowed to Kagome, indicating that she should enter, and she cautiously obeyed.

The room was darker than the last time she had seen it, the many candles extinguished. Sesshoumaru sat on his stool, a pale ghost in the dimness. The door slid shut behind her, and they were alone.

Kagome thought that this would be a good time to apologize.

"I'm sorry, Sesshoumaru. I hope you are well."

He stood and stepped forward, his face coming into what little light there was. As usual, she could read nothing from his expression.

"What have you done, Kagome?" his question sounded almost idle, but she suspected that her answer would be very important.

"I was trying to cast a healing spell." The words tumbled out of her in her haste. "I can show it to you if you'd like. It's on one of the scrolls I've been reading in the library."

"A healing spell?" His voice and expression didn't change, but some previously silent sense awoke and told her that he was surprised.

She nodded. 

"Which scroll?" he asked before calling out for an attendant. The same man who had brought Kagome opened the door.

"The human miko magic one. It should be open on the table in the library."

Sesshoumaru gestured and the man scurried away.

"How come you were bleeding? No healing magic I am aware of requires the shedding of blood." His surprise had settled and he was now simply gathering information.

Kagome blushed. "I needed something to heal, so I cut myself." She felt the need for more explanation. "I've done it before and it worked." She showed him her forearm, where several faint scars were visible. He surprised her by reaching out to trace a claw delicately over one silvery track. 

They were still standing that way, his hand on her arm, when the chamberlain returned. He handed the scroll to Sesshoumaru with a deep bow and scurried away. 

Once the door had slid shut behind him, Sesshoumaru released Kagome and began to read through the scroll. Kagome opened her mouth to speak, but he waved her off with a gesture. She subsided, watching as he scanned quickly through the spells. He slowed suddenly, and she knew he had found the spells she had been casting. He read through it once, then again.

"You followed this exactly?" 

She nodded.

"Except for the blood?"

She nodded again.

He threw back his head and barked out a harsh laugh. Kagome was stunned. Sesshoumaru was showing emotion? What had happened?

"Do you know what you did, Kagome?" This time she shook her head. Although she desperately wanted to know.

"This spell, with your little addition, is almost identical to one of the most powerful youkai magics. All it needs is the addition of a person of the opposite sex." 

Opposite sex? What was he talking about?

He continued speaking before she could work out the implications of his words.

"This spell, with blood and a partner, is for forging a youkai mate bond."

Mate bond, what was he talking ... The penny dropped and Kagome felt suddenly faint. He couldn't mean *they* were bonded, could he? she thought dimly. She couldn't have done that to them, could she?

Apparently, he did mean just that, as his next words confirmed.

"It is a spell that cannot be undone short of the death of one of the partners. We are mated Kagome, thanks to your magic."

_Oh gods,_ was all she could think before she fainted for the second time that day.

*** 

Kagome woke in her rooms with an odd feeling of deja vu. It was dark now, but she was once again on her futon fully clothed. Memory returned, and she buried her face in her hands, nearly in tears.

_What have I done?_ she asked herself. _What is *he* going to do?_

Thought provoked a sudden panic, and she shot to her feet, looking desperately around her. She had to get out of here. She could hear his words echoing in her mind _cannot be undone short of the death of one of the partners._ Does that mean he's going to kill me? She was searching for her luggage when reality set in. _If he wants to kill me, he'll do it, whether I run or not. There's no way I can escape him._ Depression settled over her. 

_I guess I'll just have to wait and see._

*** 

The next two days were uncomfortable for Kagome. 

Nothing more was said about the situation she had unwittingly caused. Sesshoumaru insisted that she take her meals with him, but neither of them seemed willing to break the silence. Occasionally, Kagome felt strange pulses of emotion, emotion that seemed to belong to someone other than her. She wished she could ask about them, find out if this was to be expected in their situation, or if this was something else she had screwed up. 

Even more disturbing was her physical awareness of him. Whenever she was in his presence, she found herself watching him out of the corners of her eyes. Had he always been this attractive, she wondered, and she was noticing now that she was spending more time in his presence? Or was this awareness a part of the misfired spell? As she surreptitiously watched him move around her she found herself wanting to tangle her fingers in his hair, pull his mouth to hers, taste his skin.

She was always relieved when their encounters ended, and she could hide from the disturbing sensations.

*** 

He broke the pattern that had established by tracking her down in the garden on the afternoon of the third day. After her recent experience with magic, she was afraid to try any new spellcasting, so instead she was weeding the part of the garden nearest her pavilion when he came up behind her.

"Kagome." The sound of her voice on his tongue was an exquisite caress, and she turned slowly to face him.

"Hello, Sesshoumaru," she whispered, almost afraid of the intensity radiating from him. She raised her eyes to his and found herself caught in his golden gaze. A now familiar slow heat began to burn in her veins, and she turned away from him, embarrassed by her reaction. "What do you want?" she asked, hoping that it would be something simple and that he would leave soon, before she did something stupid like try to tear off his clothes. Or hers.

"We are mated," he told her, "and so I have come to claim what is mine." His eyes were steady on her, telling her that he would not be diverted or denied.

Shock rolled through her, and the heat settled in the base of her belly. "I-I'm not sure that's a good idea," she told him, stepping away from him carefully. "A week ago ... " she started.

"A week ago I wanted you, but was resisting taking a human to my bed," he corrected. "But you are my mate whether we share a bed or not, so I see no reason to deny myself what I want." he stepped forward again, reaching out to take her arm, and Kagome broke, diving past him and fleeing down one of the shaded pathways. 

She felt a thrill shoot through her as she realized that he was pursuing her, his long, lazy strides keeping up with her effortlessly. He let her run, let her lead him away from the busier parts of the garden until they were in a private arbor outside his pavilion. That odd awareness was telling her that her attempt to flee was arousing him, the excitement of the chase running hot in his blood. Once they were hidden from the eyes of the court, he increased his pace, catching her easily. He spun her to face him, and she shivered as he pulled her to him. Fear and anticipation raced through her as she realized that he would not let her escape.

His mouth crashed down on hers, claiming her, demanding a response, and Kagome felt desire race through her. This was what she had wanted, she admitted to herself as she melted under his touch, what she had tried to deny she wanted for what seemed like forever. Her hands came up to tangle in his silky white hair, holding him closer as he kissed and licked his way to her neck. He bit her gently, drawing a moan of pleasure from her.

"Yes or no," his whispered question was smug.

"Yes," she replied, dazed.

He smiled and lifted her in his arms. "I believe we would both prefer privacy." 

They retired.

*** 

They spent a week at the palace, adjusting to their new relationship. They discovered that they were able to sense each others stronger emotions and their physical state, and spent some time exploring that link. They spent a great deal of time exploring the physical side of their relationship as Sesshoumaru taught Kagome how to give and receive pleasure.

There were some among Sesshoumaru's court who were displeased about their lord having taken a human mate, but after he brutally punished the first one who mentioned the issue to his face, public grumbling was kept to a minimum, with the exception of Jaken, who seemed to have a special dispensation to annoy the Lord of Western Lands, as long as he obeyed him. 

Osuka seemed quietly pleased, and Kagome suspected that it was he who had spread the news that she was a powerful miko amongst the courtiers, news that served to calm some of the worst complaints. After all, if there was one thing youkais coveted and admired, it was power, and apparently even human power was acceptable, if there was enough of it.

At the end of the week, Kagome brought up the issue that had been simmering in the back of her mind since before the accident.

"I need to go home for a while Sesshoumaru." she told her mate one night as they lay curled together on his futon. "I need to see my family and tell them what's happened."

She had explained the well to him weeks before, so he understood what she meant immediately.

"You wish to travel back to your time," he stated, and she could tell that he was unhappy with the thought.

"They need to know, Sesshoumaru. If I don't go back for a visit soon, they'll think I'm dead. I don't want to hurt them that way."

"What if you are unable to return?" he asked her seriously. "You do not understand how the well works. What if the passage closes and you are trapped there?"

She buried her head in his shoulder.

"I'm trying not to think about it."

"I will accompany you."

"But you might not be able to. As far as I know, only Inuyasha and I have ever managed to go through."

"And I have never tried. Perhaps I too will be able to visit your time." A small smile curled the corner of his mouth. "And your mother should meet her daughter's mate, should she not?"

After a few minutes more discussion, it was decided that they would return to the well in the morning, and that they would spend a week in Kagome's time before returning.

*** 

The roused themselves early, and Sesshoumaru left to tidy up a few details that would free him to travel. Kagome was dressing in the new clothing he had had made for her - a loose fitting shirt and trousers made out of a heavy gray cloth with intricately worked embroidery about the neck and cuffs - when he returned to their room. In one hand, he held a bow and a quiver containing one arrow.

"Kagome." She could sense the seriousness of his mood, so she quickly went to stand in front of him. This last week had taught her that although Sesshoumaru's emotions rarely showed through his impassive mask, he did feel them, and deeply. He simply controlled them in order to not be deceived by them, and to deceive others.

"What is it, Sesshoumaru?" she asked, wanting to ease his mood.

"This is for you." He held out the weapon, and Kagome took it, confused but pleased.

"Thank you," she smiled up at him happily, testing the draw of the bow. It was the perfect weight, exactly like the one she had carried with her when she left Inuyasha, but it was much older, the dark wood polished smooth by generations of hands.

"Try it," he told her, and pointed out of the open door to a tree in the garden. "See if you can hit the plum tree there."

"Ok." She drew the arrow and notched it on the bow. She drew back, aimed, and let the shaft fly. It sped through the air and buried itself in the tree. "There." She was satisfied, but more, she could sense restrained happiness coming from him in place of the previous seriousness.

"What is it," she asked again, and he indicated the quiver, where another arrow stood ready for her.

"It accepted you. I was not certain it would."

"How ... ?"

"It has been in my family for generations. This is the bow used by our founding bitch. It is enchanted to always shoot true, and the quiver to always have one more arrow for it's chosen master. Many of our females have used it over the centuries, and now it is yours as my mate."

She threw her arms around him and gave him a passionate kiss. "Thank you," she whispered, suddenly happy herself. They held each other for a few minutes, readying themselves to leave this place in which they had come to know each other.

Finally, Sesshoumaru lead Kagome back into the room, where she picked up a bag filled with a few essentials and slung it over her shoulders.

"Let's go."

*** 

The trip back to the well was relatively uneventful. And, Kagome was forced to concede, made much easier by the dragon they rode through the air, avoiding all the altercations that had tended to interrupt her travels with Inuyasha. It took almost two days to reach their destination. By mutual agreement, the avoided Kaede's village, not wanting to have to deal with the old miko.

The alit beside the well and stood there for a moment as Kagome prepared herself for the jump. Taking a deep breath, she climbed to the edge of the housing.

"Well, here goes nothing," she murmured as she jumped, Sesshoumaru's hand held firmly in her own. There was a flash of movement, and they stood on the bottom. Kagome looked up and felt like bursting into tears.

"It didn't work," she choked out. She had been hoping it would, praying it would. Suddenly, the alternative, going through the well without Sesshoumaru seemed frightening. What if she got trapped in the future without him.

While she was worrying, Sesshoumaru levitated them out of the well and lowered them to stand beside it. Kagome leaned into him, drawing strength.

"I don't want to go," she told him, and felt his hand brush over her hair.

"Then don't. I don't want you to go." She could sense the honesty in his words, and wished she could do what they both wanted and stay.

"I have to." She lowered her arms and took a step away. He caught her close and kissed her passionately. 

"Hurry back." She nodded and turned to the well. 

She jumped in. 

There was a flash of movement, and she buried her head in her hands for a moment, not wanting to look up and see the ceiling of the well house. She lowered her hands and looked up. Sky.

"What???" She leapt over to the ladder and scrambled up it. As her head rose over the edge, she saw Sesshoumaru watching her with a curious look on his face.

"What is wrong?" he asked her. "Why have you returned so soon?"

She looked back down into the well and let herself fall. She looked up again. Still sky.

"It didn't work," she said out loud, needing to hear the words to make it real. "It didn't work," she repeated, torn between joy and sadness. She scrambled back up the ladder and climbed out of the well. 

"I'm trapped here."

*** 

They were still standing beside the well when an event decided to impose itself, in the form of Naraku.

"Kukuku," he greeted them as he stepped out of a nearby grove of trees. Sesshoumaru immediately pushed Kagome behind him, shielding her from possible danger.

"Naraku." Sesshoumaru greeted the creature who had caused his mate so much pain calmly, but Kagome could sense his hidden rage. 

"Greetings, Lord of the West." The baboon clad figure bowed. "I beg a favor."

"And why should I grant one?" Sesshoumaru seemed but idly curious as he asked the question.

"It would cause your brother Inuyasha great pain." Naraku did know where to aim his darts. Unfortunately for him, Kagome thought, things had changed.

"An eminently desirable goal, true." Sesshoumaru conceded, seemingly reluctantly. "What do you wish from me?"

"Give me the miko, and the Shikon shards she carries." Kagome could hear gloating in Naraku's voice as the hanyou made his proposal. She wondered that he could not sense the violence crackling in the air.

"I fear that I cannot grant you this," was the answer, and she nearly smiled. Suddenly, Sesshoumaru was moving, flying across the space between them to claw at the creature.

"Die, Naraku," Sesshoumaru told him as the battle began in earnest.


	6. Unwinding

5. Balance - 

Sesshoumaru was trading blows with Naraku when Kagome sensed another shard approaching rapidly from one side. Quickly, she drew an arrow and aimed it at where the newcomer would appear. She heard the sound of rustling leaves as something - several somethings from the sound of it - rushed through the dense underbrush.

She glanced at the combat taking place in front of her and discovered that Naraku was managing to hold his own, and that she couldn't risk distracting Sesshoumaru just yet.

She was so tense that when the first of the newcomers broke through the bushes into the clearing, she nearly fired on him before realizing that it was Inuyasha. He was quickly followed by Miroku, Sango, and Shippou riding on Kirara.

For a second, Inuyasha looked torn between attacking his most hated enemy and attacking his older brother, but he quickly decided that Naraku was the greater evil, and leapt into the fray, unleashing Tetsusaiga as he jumped. The battle quickly turned against the baboon clad creature, and Kagome was watching it when an arrow streaked past her, barely missing her. She ducked and turned to face her attacker, only to see a far too familiar figure. Kikyou had reappeared and was taking advantage of Inuyasha's distraction to make another attempt on her life. Seeing that the miko was drawing her next arrow, Kagome ran for the nearby forest, hoping that she would survive the next few minutes.

Once she penetrated the forest wall, Kagome crouched behind a clump of bushes, hoping they would hide her from Kikyou at least long enough for the others to realize what was happening. If she could just hold out until Naraku left, surely they would help her. An arrow skimmed her arm and she realized that the bushes weren't sufficient shelter, and she ran for it. 

Kagome felt terror shoot through her as she saw Kikyou loose another arrow out of the corner of her eye. Fragments of thoughts flashed through her mind, faces she couldn't bear to leave behind. She was leaping to one side, knowing all the while that she would be too late, when a blur of white appeared between the two women and batted the wooden shaft aside.

Through their link, she could feel Sesshoumaru's fury, his anger that this dead thing would dare attack her. She was trying to come to grips with it when he leapt forward, claws extended.

"Poison claws!" she heard him say, and suddenly Kikyou's dirt and bone body was shattering under the effects of his corrosive toxin. She watched blankly as the dead miko collapsed, then fell to her own knees as she felt the fragment of her soul that had been animating the thing return to her. It had been so long gone she was overwhelmed by the feeling of wholeness that swept through her. 

Caught up in what was happening to her, she didn't hear Inuyasha's scream, or see him lunge at his brother. It was only when she felt a sharp pain in her shoulder that she was recalled to the scene around her.

"You bastard, you killed her!" Inuyasha was screaming as he cut at his brother again and again with Tetsusaiga. Sesshoumaru was dodging the blows with his customary agility, but she could see that he was tired after the battle with Naraku while Inuyasha seemed to be in the grips of a berserker rage. Praying she would be in time she dove for her arrows, notching one and letting it fly towards the fight.

Success! It hit the enlarged fang and dispelled the enchantment, returning it to it's customary state. Sesshoumaru took advantage of the distraction, grabbing his half-brother by the throat and holding him off the ground.

"She was already dead, Inuyasha, and she was trying to kill Kagome. And not for the first time, I might add." Kagome sighed with relief. Sesshoumaru seemed to be trying to reason with Inuyasha, despite the fact that she knew he would prefer to simply dispose of the hanyou.

"That's a lie!" Inuyasha choked out, tearing at the hand that was choking him. "Kikyou wouldn't do that."

"She did, Inuyasha." Kagome told him, angry that he would try to deny what had happened moments before. "Now, and when she took the Shikon shard after we were trapped in that cave full of fighting youkais."

"She didn't!" It was still a protest, but quieter now. Either they were getting through to him, or he was running out of air. She wasn't sure she cared which it was.

"Then what would you say she was doing, Inuyasha? Why was she shooting those arrows at me?" She would force him to admit it. He owed her that much after these last few years.

The fight drained out of Inuyasha, and he quit struggling. Kagome could see the acceptance in his face. "Let him go, Sesshoumaru."

After a moment's close inspection Sesshoumaru dropped Inuyasha to the ground. The hanyou rolled to his side, coughing, and rubbed his throat.

"I didn't know she'd tried before," he told Kagome, his eyes begging her to believe him. She closed hers, breaking the connection.

"I know, Inuyasha." She was tired now, wanting nothing more than for this to be over. She reopened her eyes to see Inuyasha huddled in on himself, and despite everything that had happened between them she felt sorry for him. She went and knelt beside him.

"I'm sorry, Inuyasha, I know you loved her." Her voice was soft, and he nodded although he didn't speak or look at her. After a moment, she rose. There were wounded to tend.

It turned out that none of the injuries were too serious. Miroku had a bump on his head where he had hit the rocks. Shippou had a number of bruises that looked like they would be painful in the morning, but no broken bones. Sango was the worst of it, sporting several new claw wounds that Kagome cleaned with some of the water from the canteen Sesshoumaru handed her. _I wish I'd finished learning that spell,_ she thought, remembering her days in Sesshoumaru's palace. _It would be perfect for healing these._ But she had to admit that as long as the cuts were kept clean, Sango should be fine.

By the time she was done checking Sango's wounds, Inuyasha had recovered and was standing as far away from Sesshoumaru as he could possibly get in the small clearing.

"Well, we should hit the trail." Inuyasha glared at his half-brother. He was disturbed by the youkai's proximity to Kagome, but he couldn't think how to separate them without angering her again. "Otherwise we'll loose that bastard's tracks again."

"No." That was Kagome, and they turned to her in surprise. "I think we'll do this our own way, Inuyasha." Sesshoumaru's hand came up to touch her shoulder where he had marked her, and she leaned into it, seeming to draw strength from the contact.

"What are you talking about, idiot?" Inuyasha got angry when he was scared, and now he was terrified. He had just lost Kikyou, and now Kagome was slipping away from him again! "I know you didn't like the situation with Kikyou, but it won't be a problem for you anymore, and if we don't leave now, we won't be able to find that bastard Naraku's trail." 

"I have some Shikon shards." She made a gesture at the pouch hanging around her neck, a gesture which ended with her hand resting on Sesshoumaru's. "Naraku will come for them eventually. We'll be waiting. And besides, I think we need to follow our own paths now, don't you?"

"Look, wench, you don't have a choice. So ..."

Kagome interrupted before he could say anything else, her storm blue eyes shooting daggers at him.

"I do have a choice Inuyasha, and you aren't it. I'm leaving." Her voice was cold, and contained a finality that struck Inuyasha to his core. She couldn't leave him, he thought, she couldn't!

Shippo flung himself into her arms, sobbing. "You can't leave Kagome. You can't leave me! Please!" She stroked his back and looked up at the youkai lord standing beside her. Something almost tangible passed between miko and youkai before Kagome raised the kitsune's head and looked at his tear-stained face.

"Do you want to come with us, Shippou? I'd like it if you would." Her voice was inviting now, her eyes full of the compassion the others were used to seeing from her, and Shippou nodded enthusiastically, brushing the tears from his eyes.

"Hai, Kagome." He smiled.

"Now look here," Inuyasha stormed, only to be once more interrupted, this time by Sesshoumaru.

"Then it is time for us to depart," he told his mate.

"Over my dead body!" Inuyasha shouted, launching himself at his half-brother, half-insane with fury. Sesshoumaru moved gracefully out of the way, swatting Inuyasha into a nearby tree.

"Out of respect for my mate, I'm afraid I will have to resist that offer, brother," the older youkai said as he turned and offered his hand to the woman in question. 

She took it, and before a stunned Inuyasha could recover enough to leap back into the fray, they were rising into the air.

And then they were gone.


	7. Epilogue 1

Night was beginning to fall as Inuyasha, Miroku, and Sango walked away from the battlefield, exhausted physically and mentally by the day's happenings. Too numb to think, they followed a narrow, overgrown path through the trees until it led them to a sheltered clearing. 

"We should stop here for the night," Sango suggested, and Miroku quickly chimed in with his agreement.

Inuyasha wanted to argue, wanted to put as much distance as possible between them and the place where everything had gone so wrong. But while he was already healing, Sango and Miroku were much worse for wear after the days exertion, and so he nodded.

It was the work of a few minutes to gather wood and start a small fire. That taken care of, Sango began preparing a meal, a stew of vegetables that could be left to simmer gently while they set up for the night. Their preparations were interrupted briefly when Miroku, who had spent the time mixing a healing salve, insisted that she allow him to treat her wounds, but by the time the stew was ready, everything was done.

The meal was consumed in silence, Inuyasha lost in his thoughts, the others reluctant to intrude upon them. Soon it was over, and the humans prepared themselves for the night, pulling out bedrolls and clearing rocks from the ground.

"Ill keep watch tonight," Inuyasha volunteered. "You guys need the sleep more than I do right now." Besides, he thought, he wouldnt be sleeping anyway. 

No one argued.

Sango unrolled her blankets under a tree near the fire. Without a word, Miroku unrolled his next to it. For a moment, the youkai hunter thought about pummeling the monk, but his eyes held none of his usual lecherous humor, only a quiet determination, and she decided to let it stand. For the night at least. Tomorrow was another day.

By the time Inuyasha had taken his customary position in a nearby treetop, they were asleep, Sangos right hand resting lightly on Miroku's, covering the rosary that sealed the Air Rip.

Hours later, still perched in the tree, Inuyasha was staring off into the starry sky, trying to come to grips with the days events.

It hurt. It hurt to know that she was gone, that even when this quest was over, she wouldnt be his. Without his ever having realized it, he had assumed she would stay with him, would continue to comfort him and make him believe in such things as love and compassion. Despite his tangled relationship with Kikyou, despite the fact that she was from his future, he from her past, despite the ever present danger of Naraku, and the youkai who were after the Shikon shards, despite everything, he had believed she would be with him when it was over.

His eyes wandered to a lake in the distance, and on the far shore he could see the faint flicker of another campfire. She was there now, with his half-brother. And he knew she always would be.

In the moonlight, the tears on his face were invisible.


	8. Epilogue 2

Kagome stood in the shadow of the well house and looked over at her mother's home. It looked smaller than she remembered. She tried to work up the courage to walk the short distance and knock on the door. A clawed hand closed warmly over her shoulder.

"It will be all right, dearest," her mate reassured her. "She is your mother, and she loves you. She will be pleased for you, I promise."

"I know. It's just been so long." But his words gave her the strength she needed to leave the shadows and cross the yard to knock at the door. It was pulled open almost immediately by a young boy.

"Hello?" he said, his expression curious as he looked at his visitors.

"Souta?" Kagome's voice trembled a bit as she spoke his name.

Shock, quickly followed by happiness showed on his face, as he recognized her.

"Mom, Mom," he called even as he threw his arms around his sister and hugged her as though he would never let go, "it's Kagome! She's come back! Come quick!"

There was a flurry of movement, and suddenly another body threw itself into the hug, arms wrapping fiercely around Kagome.

"Oh, Kagome, we were so worried. You were supposed to be back months ago!"

Kagome felt a twinge of pain at the thought of the grief she had caused to her family. But they had to know the truth.

"Not months for me, Mom," she said quietly, drawing back from their embrace. She saw her mother's eyes widen as they took in the changes to her appearance.

"How long," her mother whispered, touching a hand to her daughter's cheek as though afraid she would vanish.

Kagome looked at Sesshoumaru for strength, before turning back to her mother.

"Years Mom. Almost five hundred." The words were barely out before her mother, ghost white, fainted. Sesshoumaru caught her easily and carried her into the house to lay her on a couch. Kagome knelt by her side. Souta stood back, stunned by the revelation, waiting to see what would happen next.

Kagome's mother regained consciousness gradually, her eyes flickering around the room before finally coming to rest on her daughter. Slow tears began to roll down her face.

"Don't cry, Mom." Kagome told her. "It'll be all right." She looked around frantically. "It's *been* all right." Her eyes fell on Sesshoumaru who was standing against the far wall. "Mom, I'd like you to meet someone very important to me." She gestured, and he came to join her. She took his hand as she turned back to her mother. "This is my husband, Mom, Higurashi Sesshoumaru."

Her mother stared assessingly at the oddly named man beside her daughter. His face was impassive, revealing none of his thoughts, but he had a protective arm around her daughter's shoulders, and she leaned into him in a way that spoke of trust and long companionship. 

"Does he love you," she asked, her maternal instincts coming to the fore. A surprise son-in-law he might be, and her daughter centuries older than she had been last time she saw her, but some things a mother always needed to know. 

"Oh, yes. Very much." Kagome smiled, and it was the smile of a woman who knew exactly how much she was loved. "As I do him."

Mrs. Higurashi smiled. Everything else, they could work out, she decided. "Good. Welcome home." Kagome threw herself into her mother's arms and sobbed out her relief. 

There were questions to be asked, and stories to be told, but there was time for that later. 


End file.
